Sometimes Clint speaks before he thinks. Luckily, Tony’s always there to back him up.
Yea. This is one of my favorites. Haven’t yet figured out how I’ll write the second chapter. Damn action storylines. I’m not good at that. But it’s still one of my favorites. So I hope you enjoy it.
Oh. And Tony’s nickname is stolen from my friend Jarad. I kid you not. And I’m pretty sure he gave it to himself. Because he is a silly man.
Oh. AND this references ‘Linked’, when Tony gave Clint access to all of his bank accounts and Stark Industries and all that jazz.
And “Uniforms, Quinjets, and Hide and Go Seek” too. There’s a bit of a reference in there.”
And I’m done with the author’s notes now. Promise. 😛
Hawkeye58: Hey Tony. You ever ride a horse?
Stark1: Once when I was like, really really young. Why?
Hawkeye58: Oh. So. Guess that means you never played polo, then?
Stark1: HAHAHAHAHAHA oh my God. No! What, because I’m rich I automatically play polo?
Hawkeye58: Well no. I mean. Never saw any horses around but I figured I’d ask. I guess I more meant to ask do you know its rules? I know it has to do with horses and a stick or something. Like on the shirts.
Stark1: Hahaha oh man. Not the particulars, no. Seen a few games but I’m no expert. There was a team in school but I was very much not the athletic type. Mom was a bit bummed. She liked polo.
……..I’m also a totally boss cricket player. And badminton. And all those other rich guy sports. 😛
Hawkeye58: Well, that’s awesome. You should teach me those sometime. I’d like to learn. Specially cricket. But now I have to figure out how the hell to play polo.
Stark1: …….oh my God you ass I was kidding. Ahahahahaha
Hawkeye58: Oh…….shut up.
Stark1: Hahahahahaha no.
I AM, however, a completely epic croquet player. Legit. Folks used to call me the Wicket Snatcher.
…….I called myself that, actually.
………I got beat up a lot as a child, did I ever mention that?
Hawkeye58: HAHAHAHA okay oh my God that’s great.
Except that very last part. I need a list of names.
Stark1: Hahaha what, you gonna go after all of them?
Hawkeye58: Maybe. It’ll be on my spare time to-do list.
Stark1: Hahaha. Ass. You’re fucking cute, you know that?
Hawkeye58: No. Because you’re the only one who thinks so. And yeah. Polo.
Stark1: Haha. Okay, you’ll still have to look up the rules cuz like I said, I don’t know the particulars, but the easiest way to describe it is like hockey on horseback, without the fisticuffs. Four teammates using the sticks to try and score a goal on the opposite team. See? Kinda like hockey. If that makes it any easier.
Hawkeye58: Aww. No fisticuffs? Lame.
……so four people on each team?
Stark1: Yea. And no, no fisticuffs. They’re very uptight about that, both cuz of the people and the horses. Don’t wanna hurt either.
Hawkeye58: Hnn. Good point.
…….jerk didn’t say anything about teams.
Stark1: Haha what jerk? What’s this for, anyway? And can I come watch?
Hawkeye58: Some guy who’s like, a go between or something for some European secret agency. But I didn’t like him. So I was just like, staying out of his way. I guess he took offense to that. We butt heads. He challenged me to some crap. I kicked his ass and he made some comments. Told him to name the damn game…..fucking polo. Like….really? Of course I accepted heh. Mighta been a bit hasty.
Stark1: HAHAHA you ass.
Hawkeye58: Hey, he totally started it. I was actually trying to avoid pissing Fury off.
Stark1: By challenging the guy to a polo match?
Hawkeye58: Hey, I didn’t come up with it……I just agreed.
Stark1: No, but you challenged him in the first place.
Hawkeye58: He was doubting my abilities! I had to prove him wrong.
Stark1: You ass.
……..how’re you going to find three teammates?
Hawkeye58: I have no fucking clue. This guy’s breaking the rules of this kinda challenge. Thought it was supposed to be one on one.
You think Steve knows how to ride a horse?
Stark1: HA! Unlikely.
……..you want me to help? Mean, it’s been a long fucking time but…….think I can manage.
Hawkeye58: Well. You were gonna be my first choice. I figured it might be like riding a bike or something and you’d remember. And Thor. Cuz I’m pretty sure he can ride a horse. And I figured he’d have fun. Just need a third person then, right?
Stark1: Haha then why didn’t you just ask me? Ass.
Hmm. I mean, we can ask Steve but he grew up in Brooklyn. Not many horses there.
Hawkeye58: Because I didn’t know I needed a team until a minute ago. Crap. Totally not fair.
Stark1: Well have him drop it down. Three person team. Maybe that’s allowed.
Hawkeye58: Yeah? Okay. Hey. You sure you’re good with this? I mean. This is kinda springing it on you. I shoulda asked about it more before accepting.
Stark1: Haha shut up. I’m totally cool with it.
Fuck. Wish I could think of a fourth person. Maybe we SHOULD just ask Steve.
Hawkeye58: Well, I mean. Maybe his super soldier-ness will help with it? Maybe he’ll learn fast?
Stark1: Haha yea. And he probably played…..whatever the 1940s equivalent of street hockey was. I know they had one. Just can’t remember what they called it.
Hawkeye58: Hahaha stick ball. But yeah. Can’t be too different with a horse.
Stark1: Haha shut up. Don’t laugh at me. Ass.
Hawkeye58: Hey. Didn’t mean to…..but you know honestly, at this point, I don’t care how this turns out, if I get to see you guys playing the game.
Stark1: HA! And why’s that?
Hawkeye58: Because it’ll be fun and ridiculous.
Stark1: Oh? You think you’ll be any better?
Hawkeye58: Nope. But I won’t be watching me.
Stark1: Haha. And what exactly is YOUR horse riding experience, Agent Barton?
Hawkeye58: Well…..I can stand on one while it’s running and hit a target, if the horse is trained right. Not much outside of circus skills, though.
Stark1: Oh man. That’s fuckin’ sweet. You gotta show me that sometime.
Hawkeye58: Heh yeah?
Stark1: Hell yea. Awesome. Dude, you never show me any of your cool circus stuff. How come?
Hawkeye58: You don’t have a horse. And I don’t know. I never think of it.
Stark1: Well it’s not like that’s your only circus trick. And I would totally fucking buy you a horse, just to see that.
Hawkeye58: Haha. Okay, okay. I’ll show you some sometime.
Stark1: Yea? Awesome.
Hawkeye58: Of course. I love showing off.
Stark1: HA! No…..not you!
Hawkeye58: I know, right. I’m so modest usually.
Stark1: Oh, totally.
Hawkeye58: Yup. Totally my modest nature that drew you in.
Stark1: Ha. Nope. I like you all snotty and conceited.
Hawkeye58: Haha yeah?
Stark1: Oh yea. Knew right the moment I met you. I’d met my match.
Hawkeye58: Hahaha. I. Am flattered.
Stark1: Hahaha yea? You enjoy being as conceited and obnoxious as me?
Hawkeye58: Yup. I do.
Stark1: Ha! Wow.
Hawkeye58: What. I take pride in knowing how awesome I am.
Stark1: Oh? Obnoxious equates to awesome? Or was it just the comparison to me? 😛
Hawkeye58: Ha. Just because people get jealous and say we’re obnoxious.
Stark1: What? What’re you talking about?
Hawkeye58: They only say we’re obnoxious because they’re jealous of our awesome. Trying to bring us down.
Stark1: HA! Yea, okay, you tell yourself that. I know I’m obnoxious.
Hawkeye58: Haha. Only when I try to be.
Stark1: Nope. You just are.
Hawkeye58: Hahaha hey!
Stark1: Don’t give me that. You’re a brat and you know it.
Hawkeye58: Ha. Do I get bonus points for knowing it?
Stark1: Oh? What kinda bonus points you looking for?
Hawkeye58: Any kind. Boots points are all good.
Hawkeye58: …….shit. Bonus. Meant bonus. Shit up. I can spell.
Stark1: …… “shit” up? You’re on a roll. 😉
Hawkeye58: ……or apparently I can’t. I hate you.
Stark1: Oh you do not.
Hawkeye58: ……shut up.
Stark1: Make me.
Hawkeye58: Maybe when I get home.
Stark1: Thought I was coming to you? Where’s the polo match?
Hawkeye58: Oh right. Guess this guy has an estate in Sweden. Who keeps an estate in Sweden? He’s not even Swedish!
Stark1: ……I am making no comments.
Hawkeye58: ……do you have an estate in Sweden?
Hawkeye58: Okay then.
Stark1: Yea, really.
Hawkeye58: …..so where?
Stark1: Um…….besides New York and Cali?
Hawkeye58: Yeah. I never actually looked at that list you gave me………sorry.
Stark1: ……..I gave you a list?
Hawkeye58: Yeah. Well. I thought it was part of that paperwork you gave me when you linked me your assets.
Stark1: Oh. Hah. Guess it WOULD be in there, huh.
Hawkeye58: I would think so.
Stark1: Heh. Yea.
Hawkeye58: So. Where is it?
Stark1: Um…….THEY are in France and Japan.
Hawkeye58: Oh yeah? Shit, really? Hey. Both of those are cooler than Sweden.
Stark1: Hahaha glad you think so. Mom was a culture nut……think I’ve mentioned that plenty of times of times before…..so she loved Paris. And we went to a lot of trade shows in Tokyo, so she got to love the countryside in Japan.
Hawkeye58: Yeah. Japan’s nice. Haven’t gotten too acquainted with France.
Stark1: Yea? Well we’ll have to go.
……..still working on buying that place in London, too.
Hawkeye58: Oh right. I forgot about that.
Stark1: Heh. Yea.
…….this guy better have good horses.
Stark1: Hahaha oh? Whatcha gonna do if he doesn’t?
Hawkeye58: I have no idea. Borrow some horses from somewhere.
Stark1: Hahaha oh yea, easy as that.
Hawkeye58: I’m sure I can find a place. They don’t need to know I’m borrowing them.
Stark1: HA! Okay, no. You are NOT “borrowing” polo ponies. I’ll work it out.
Hawkeye58: Aww. I’d find good ones.
Stark1: Yea. And get in trouble. Ass.
Hawkeye58: Shut up. No one would have caught me probably.
Stark1: ……yea…. “probably”.
Hawkeye58: Fine, fine. I won’t borrow horses.
Stark1: Good. I’ll get you some real good ponies. Promise.
…….any reason you haven’t looked at the info I gave you on the accounts and stuff?
Hawkeye58: No, just. I mean, I tried. But it’s a lot of stuff. And I didn’t understand bits. And I meant to have you go over some with me but then I didn’t think you really needed to.
Stark1: …….so……..you really don’t…….it’s not cuz you’re….that you don’t want it?
Hawkeye58: What? No! No, not at all. I mean. I love that you’re sharing that with me. All of it. It means so damn much.
Stark1: Yea? Seriously? Cuz if you don’t like it, I’d really rather know.
Hawkeye58: No. Tony. Shut up. I told you. It’s just a lotta papers. And numbers. And legal things.
Stark1: Okay okay! I just……I worry. You were so hesitant when this all began. I always worry that I’m pushing you too much. And I can’t help it. That’s just me. I’m pushy.
Hawkeye58: Yeah well. I have no qualms telling people to back off. Seriously, Tony. It’s amazing.
Stark1: Good. Awesome.
Hawkeye58: Yeah. So. Next free time. You can go over it with me.
Hawkeye58: Yeah. Meant to. Just yeah. Heh. Didn’t think about it.
Stark1: Yea? Okay. So long as you want to. I mean…..we should. In case anything happens to me.
Hawkeye58: Okay. You’re not allowed to say that. Nothing’s gonna happen to you. Not allowed.
Stark1: Hey, I’m doing my best! I’m just saying. I want you to understand all of it. Just in case anything DOES happen.
Hawkeye58: ……okay. I mean. I’ll. Shit, though. You say that and I feel like I don’t want you to explain, just so nothing CAN happen to you. Which is really stupid to think, I know. And I definitely want you to, just. Yeah. Trying to explain my paranoia.
Stark1: Hey. I’m not going anywhere. Okay? It’ll be okay.
Hawkeye58: Yeah. Yeah. I know. Thanks.
Stark1: Yea. Just a bit.
Hawkeye58: Haha. Can’t help it.
Hawkeye58: What. Being paranoid? Yeah. Just happens.
Stark1: Heh. You like taking care of me.
Hawkeye58: Well, yeah. Why wouldn’t I?
Stark1: No reason. I just like it.
Hawkeye58: Good. Cuz I’m not stopping.
Stark1: Good. I love it.
Hawkeye58: Haha well I hope so.
Stark1: Ha. Did you doubt it?
Hawkeye58: Well. I’ve been told my paranoia can be overbearing sometimes.
Stark1: Nah. I like that you want to keep me safe. I mean……as long as it doesn’t make you totally freak out. Don’t want that.
Hawkeye58: Heh nah. Not under most normal circumstances at least.
Hawkeye58: Yup. So. Maybe after this stupid polo thing, you can go over stuff? After victory or comfort sex.
Stark1: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA oh my God. I love you.
Hawkeye58: I love you too.
…….and I’m serious.
Stark1: …….about the sex? Or the discussion? Or both?
Hawkeye58: Both. We can do them in reverse order if you want.
Stark1: Haha well would you be able to concentrate with the thought of sex lurking in the back of your head? Or would it just be extra incentive to pay attention?
Hawkeye58: Oh. That’s tough. Maybe…….sex as incentive?
Oh, what about sex before, and more sex as incentive!
Stark1: Oh my God. Hahaha. You’re such a pervert.
Hawkeye58: Hey. Am not.
Stark1: Are too. You LOVE fucking me. Repeatedly.
Hawkeye58: So? That’s not perverted. It’s something we both like.
Stark1: So? You’re still a pervert.
Stark1: Yea? Why do you always throw me down right away? And let me talk you into all sorts of kinky shit? Not that it takes much talking into.
Hawkeye58: ……..because it’s something we both like?
Stark1: This is true. But also cuz you’re a pervert.
Hawkeye58: Yeah? And what does that make you?
Stark1: Oh, I’m a HUUUUUUGE pervert.
Hawkeye58: Hahaha. That big of one, huh?
Stark1: Hell yea. Like you didn’t know.
Hawkeye58: I may have suspected.
Stark1: Ha. Only suspected, huh.
Hawkeye58: Yup. Well. Does it still count when the second party enjoys it just as much? Never thought of it as perverted in that case. Just figured you had some really good ideas.
Stark1: Eh, I think it counts. Perverse just means you’ve got a dirty mind. Which you do.
Hawkeye58: Yeah. Guess that’s true enough.
So. You like my idea? Or you just wanna go with Incentive?
Stark1: …….no, I think I like your idea just fine.
Hawkeye58: Yeah? Awesome.
Stark1: Heh. Glad you think so.
……you talk to Steve and Thor?
Hawkeye58: Steve said he’d try. I told him if all he did was sit there so we weren’t disqualified, that was fine. Thor sounded very enthusiastic about the whole thing.
Stark1: HAHA! Oh man. Great mental image of Steve just sitting on a horse, looking bewildered.
Hawkeye58: I know, right. I feel like this may end terribly and this bastard will get to rub it in my face, but you know……I don’t really care. I somehow got half the Avengers to be on my ghetto polo team. I would write home about that.
Stark1: Ha! Oh yea?
Hawkeye58: Yeah. Gonna send you a postcard about it. Be all. Hey Tony. Today I played polo. Guess what? You were there! It was awesome.
Stark1: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OH MY GOD
Hawkeye58: It’ll be great. You’ll love it.
Stark1: I already do. God. You are so fucking fantastic.
Hawkeye58: Hahaha. Cuz I’m gonna send you a postcard about something you were involved in?
Stark1: Yea. Well, for many reasons. But yea.
Hawkeye58: Heh. I love you.
Stark1: Oh do you
Hawkeye58: I do.
Stark1: Mm. Glad to hear it.
Hawkeye58: Like you didn’t know.
Stark1: Haha. No. But I’ll never grow tired of hearing it.
Hawkeye58: Well good. Cuz I’m gonna keep telling you.
Stark1: Heh. Good.
……so…….you always say I’m gonna be your last.
Hawkeye58: Yeah. Why?
Stark1: …..that mean you’re gonna grow old with me?
Hawkeye58: I sure as hell hope so.
Stark1: Oh man. I love you so much.
Hawkeye58: Haha because I plan on getting old with you? Well. Older. You’re pretty old already. 😛
Stark1: HAHAHA hey!
Hawkeye58: It’s okay. You’re still sexy as fuck.
Stark1: Well duh.
Guess you ARE a pervert. Fetish for old men.
Hawkeye58: Nah. Just you.
Stark1: Good to know.
Shouldn’t be mocking my age. Just means I’m gonna get all old and die sooner than we’d both like. Asshole. 😛
Hawkeye58: Shut up. Are not. You’re too stubborn for that.
Stark1: Hey, I get old, I die. It’s sort of a course of nature.
Hawkeye58: Well……it’s still not gonna be anytime soon.
Stark1: Yea. What’re you bitching about, anyway. You started it. Calling me old. Ass.
Hawkeye58: Hey. I like it.
Stark1: Like what?
Hawkeye58: You being older.
Stark1: ……..see? Told you you’re a kinky pervert. 😉
Hawkeye58: Ha. Shut up.
Stark1: Hahahaha no. Why d’you like it?
Hawkeye58: I don’t know, actually. Didn’t even realize it at first. It was like my brain just decided when it figured out that it was awesome. Maybe cuz you’re older but you don’t really act it. And you’re sexy.
Stark1: Hahahahaha okay. Heh. Neat.
…….not weird, right? Well. Not bad-weird?
Stark1: Haha no. I like it.
Hawkeye58: Good. Cuz that’s the way it is.
Stark1: Good. I’d hate to be too old for you. Get dumped for a younger model.
Hawkeye58: Oh, right. Like that’ll happen.
Stark1: Hnn. Better not. Gonna grow old with me. Just said so.
Hawkeye58: Damn straight I am.
Stark1: Heh. Y’know, never would’ve pegged you for that type. Never was that type myself. Then you came along.
Hawkeye58: What type? Liking older men? I’m not. It’s a side effect of loving you.
Stark1: HA! Okay, you’re freaking adorable and I love you so much. No. I meant the type to settle down.
Hawkeye58: Oh…..well. I mean no. And you know I’m not good with being stationary. But. Well. It’s nice with you. I like having someplace and someone to come home to.
Stark1: And you think you’ll keep on being okay with that? Liking that?
Hawkeye58: Yeah. Yeah I think I will.
Stark1: …..think? O..okay. Fuck. Um. Well.
If you need to leave…..um…. fuck. I don’t know.
Hawkeye58: Tony. I’m not leaving you. Not gonna go anywhere you couldn’t come with me. Barring work, which doesn’t count.
Stark1: Oh. Okay. Good.
Hawkeye58: Stop being weird. I know. I’m sorry. I suck at this. But I want to be with you, Tony.
Stark1: You don’t suck. I just. I get paranoid. I don’t want you to have to give up your whole life to be with me. But I don’t want you to leave. I’m sorry.
Hawkeye58: Hey. You’re not making me give anything up. I know you wouldn’t.
Stark1: No. I wouldn’t.
…..sorry. Don’t mean to get all hyper-worried.
Hawkeye58: Heh. It’s okay. It. Well, it means a lot that it makes you hyper-worried.
Stark1: Yea? Heh. Okay good.
Hawkeye58: Yeah. And like I said before. I’m always coming home. Always.
Stark1: Good. Cuz yea……I need you.
Hawkeye58: Yeah well, I need you too. Never gonna let you go.
Stark1: What would you do if I escaped? 😛
Hawkeye58: I’d find you.
Like you would, though. You love me.
Stark1: Oh, I adore you. But you showed me once before how interesting you can make the chase.
…….I still maintain that I was not scared.
Hawkeye58: Mnn. And I still maintain that you were.
Hawkeye58: Haha were.
Stark1: …..shut up.
Hawkeye58: I love you.
Hawkeye58: Ha. Don’t ‘tch’ me.
Stark1: I’ll do it all I want. Making fun of me.
Hawkeye58: Not. Just saying.
Stark1: Yea. Saying it to give me a hard time. Brat. You’re an intimidating fucker when you wanna be.
Hawkeye58: Well, yeah. Need to be, sometimes.
Stark1: Is fucking your boyfriend one of those times?
Hawkeye58: Nah. But hunting him down was. Not supposed to run from me.
Stark1: Hey! Hahaha I didn’t! You just got all scary on your own that time.
Hawkeye58: Was in the zone.
Stark1: Haha yea……I could see that. Was hot. A bit scary……but hot.
……I mean, not scary. Cuz I wasn’t scared.
Hawkeye58: Oh? You sure? You seem unsure.
Stark1: No. I’m sure. Totally sure. Very very positive.
Hawkeye58: Mnn. If you say so.
Stark1: ……..shut up.
It was sexy, I’ll give you that much.
Hawkeye58: Damn right it was.
Stark1: Ha! Oh? Glad you agree.
Hawkeye58: Well, yeah. Wouldn’t have kept it up otherwise.
Stark1: Yea? You like fucking me at my office?
Hawkeye58: Hey. Your office is nice.
Stark1: Ha. That’s the whole reason why?
Hawkeye58: What, that I fucked you there? Nah. That was just where I found you.
Stark1: You knew I was going to be there. You came to find me at the Tower. It was pretty much a guarantee I’d be in an office or a conference room.
Hawkeye58: Coulda been in your bar area. Or one of the labs.
Stark1: …….oh. OH. Oh man. Fuck me on the bar sometime?
Hawkeye58: Yeah? Heh. Sounds good to me.
Stark1: Motherfucking hell.
Hawkeye58: Yeah. Glad you thought of it.
Stark1: Fuck. Me too.
Hawkeye58: Well. Can be more incentive for later.
Stark1: Later when?
Hawkeye58: After going over those papers.
Stark1: Oh. Oh. Um. Well. The bar’s kind of…..NOT in Sweden?
Hawkeye58: Well, I assumed we’d go home first. Unless you wanted to stick around Sweden?
Stark1: Head straight home after the match? I figured we’d wanna rest up first.
Hawkeye58: Yeah but. I don’t know what’s in Sweden. And I don’t want to hang around this ass any more than I need to. Don’t know why, but I just don’t like him.
Stark1: Ha. Well, we don’t have to stay near him. I’d just rather not take a long flight out there, play polo, then immediately take a long flight back.
Hawkeye58: Yeah. I see your point.
Stark1: Yea. Just….sleep a bit. Rest up before we fly home.
Hawkeye58: Okay. We’ll find a place.
……when is this thing, anyway?
Hawkeye58: Um….I think he said 3.
Stark1: ……today? Three TODAY?! Fuck Clint. There’s no WAY I can get Thor and Steve and I out there by three! Unless I use the suit and either Thor or I carry Steve, which I guess is doable? Maybe?
Hawkeye58: Yeah? Damn. Well. I mean, I told him I’d get there when I get there. Don’t worry about it. I can stall.
Stark1: No, we’ll have to try it. Cuz if we take the plane, it’ll take way too long.
Hawkeye58: Hey. I mean. You guys would just be doing me a favor. A really stupid last minute one, and I don’t want to put you out for that.
Stark1: Shut the hell up. We’re coming.
Hawkeye58: You guys are awesome. Specially you.
Stark1: Well, YEA especially me.
Hawkeye58: Haha. Really. Thanks for this.
Stark1: Seriously. I’m glad to do it. It’ll be fun.
Hawkeye58: Yeah. I think so. Hope so.
Stark1: Hey, even if we get our asses handed to us, it’ll still be fun.
Hawkeye58: Right. It’s gonna be great.
…….hey. You think Steve wants to fuck Tasha? I’m pretty sure Steve wants to fuck Tasha.
Hawkeye58: Wait, what? Really? I mean, I HAVE seen him looking at her. And he was very quick to protect her during the battle with Loki. I just figured it was old-fashioned chivalry or something.
Stark1: Haha really? Wow. Maybe I’m totally off.
No, I think he’s got the hots for her.
Hawkeye58: That is hilarious. And great. Oh man. Wonder if he’ll ever act on it.
Stark1: Ha! It’d be fun to see. He’d be all nervous and polite and blushing virgin-y.
……but……you’re cool with that, though?
Hawkeye58: What? Yeah, of course. I mean. If they want. Steve’s a great guy. And I don’t think Tasha would mess with him.
Stark1: Heh. Okay. Cool. I mean, I figured. Knew. But cool.
Hawkeye58: Why wouldn’t I be okay with it?
Stark1: No, I know you would be. I’m just being stupid again. Sorry.
You guys are just so close. And I know you don’t have feelings for her, but……
…..I’d feel a whole lot better if she were in a relationship.
Hawkeye58: Heh. Well. Maybe it’ll happen, then.
Stark1: Sorry if I’m being silly. I know you don’t want her. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t want you.
Hawkeye58: Haha. Pretty sure she never really wanted me like that.
Stark1: …….um….you DO realize you two had a relationship, don’t you?
Hawkeye58: Yeah. But…….okay, it was complicated.
Hawkeye58: See. I mean. I don’t know. The first time anything really happened it was after a mission gone bad, and we were hurt and tired, but high on adrenaline, and yeah. After that….well. I always took stuff like that seriously and Nat. Well. She cared, but not the same and…..complicated. And nothing you have to worry about anymore.
Stark1: ……see? This is why I don’t like Tasha. I mean, I guess I should be thanking her, since if she wasn’t such a heartless bitch, I wouldn’t have gotten you. Still……what a cunt.
Hawkeye58: Ha! Well……she has her own issues.
Stark1: Whatever. We all do. Doesn’t mean she should do that to you. And then go on to backstab you.
Which I’ve promised to try not to harp on, so I’ll shut up now.
Hawkeye58: Heh. I love you.
Stark1: I love you too. So fucking much. And I’m keeping you. No escape for you now, tough guy.
Hawkeye58: Hahaha. No? No chance at all?
Stark1: Nope. Just try and stop me.
Hawkeye58: Haha. Only when I feel like seeing what you’ll do.
Stark1: Heh. Yea. Just…..make sure I know that’s what you’re doing.
Hawkeye58: Hey. That would be the only reason I would do it. I’m not leaving you.
Stark1: Yea. Yea, I know. But you know I get paranoid. Heh. Just saw a nice example of it a minute ago.
Hawkeye58: Ha yeah. Okay. I’ll make sure you know I’m only doing it for a rise.
Stark1: Yea. Heh. Well, generally I like when you do that.
…….we both know I’d totally lose that game.
Hawkeye58: What? Of keeping me? Cuz I think you’d do a damn good job of it.
Stark1: Haha well, thanks. I more meant you trying to escape. If I had to hunt you down, I’d fail miserably. I mean, I’m good at tracking your location, but I’m pretty sure you’d manage to elude me once I got there.
Hawkeye58: It’d be close. You can be really stubbornly determined when you wanna be.
Stark1: Ha hell yea I can. But I’m not a super assassin. You were trained for this sort of shit.
Hawkeye58: Haha. Yeah, guess that’s true.
Hey. Do you. You don’t think I’m overly prone to violence, right? I mean, I know I can be rough, but….it’s not BAD rough, right?
Stark1: ……you ARE joking, right?
Hawkeye58: …..no. I just. I know I tend to react first. And a lot of that is because I’m hot-headed. But the training just makes it more deadly. And either way I just…..I don’t know. I mean. There’s a difference between playing rough and being violent, right?
Stark1: Shut the hell up. I love the way you act. Love it.
Hawkeye58: Yeah? Okay. I know. Being stupid, just…..guess I let one of his comments get to me. Which was dumb. Thanks.
Stark1: Okay, what the hell did this asshole say?
Hawkeye58: Well. He was pissed. I’d outscored him on a flight simulator and showed him up at the range. So he suggests hand to hand. Probably cuz he’s bigger than me, he thought he had a shot. Heh. Didn’t mention I spar regularly with Captain America. Anyway. I win and he said he should have realized, with my background, I would excel at violence. That’s when I snapped and told him I was just better than him and would kick his ass at anything he put out…..so, polo.
Stark1: ……yea. I may have to hurt this guy.
Hawkeye58: Hey. It’s fine. I mean, I know he was just pissed. Yeah, it was a low fucking blow but you don’t think there’s anything wrong, and that’s what matters.
Stark1: It also matters that he upset you. So yea. I’m gonna hurt him.
Hawkeye58: Yeah? On his own estate? Don’t know how well that’d go over.
Stark1: Hey. I’m me. I can get away with just about anything.
Hawkeye58: Hahaha. Good point.
Stark1: Tch. Don’t know how you could forget.
Hawkeye58: Not a clue. Musta hit my head or something.
Stark1: Ha. Dork.
Stark1: Are too. You’re a huge dork and I love it.
Hawkeye58: Hahaha what?
Stark1: What do you mean, ‘what’?
Hawkeye58: How am I a dork?
Stark1: Cuz. You worry bout things you shouldn’t. You’re obsessed with purple. You find my geekyness sexy. You try and act all big and bad but then you do things like bring me soup when I’m sick and prepare bubble baths for me. Shall I go on? Cuz I could.
Hawkeye58: …….fuck. I AM a dork.
Stark1: HAHAHAHAHA oh my God. I love you. I love you so Goddamn fucking much.
Hawkeye58: Haha glad to hear it.
Stark1: Like you didn’t know.
I love every single thing about you. Every side. Cool and badass and dorky.
Hawkeye58: Good. Cuz I love every part of you, too.
Stark1: Obviously. I’m pretty awesome.
Hawkeye58: Oh yeah. Had to be for this to work.
Stark1: Haha oh is that so?
Hawkeye58: Yup. Otherwise you’d’ve lost patience with me ages ago. But our awesomness is compatible.
Stark1: Ha. Yup. I’m a persistent bastard.
Hawkeye58: Yeah you are. Love it.
Stark1: Ha! Good. Annoys most everyone else.
Hawkeye58: Good thing I’m not most everyone else.
Stark1: Ha. Can say that again.
Hawkeye58: I would, but that would be repetitive.
Stark1: Ass. You know what I meant.
Hawkeye58: Haha. Yeah.
So. Think we have a chance of winning today?
Stark1: …….probably not. Depends how good this guy and his team are. I mean, we may all pick stuff up pretty fast, but if these guys are good, it won’t matter.
Hawkeye58: Haha. Ah well. It’ll still be fun, right?
Stark1: Oh yea. Be a blast.
……think Thor’s gonna be violent?
Hawkeye58: Well. He’s always enthusiastic. Hopefully he’ll understand the rules.
Stark1: Haha yea. I can just see him getting incredibly carried away. I would imagine sports on Asgard are a bit more violent than ours. Just judging by the sort of damage Thor can deal out and withstand.
Hawkeye58: Ha true. And judging by how disappointed he gets watching hockey fights. Asgard sports sound both fun and fucking terrifying.
Stark1: Haha well at least the hockey’ll give him SOME idea what to expect. Sort of.
Hawkeye58: True. That’s good.
Stark1: Yea. It should all work out okay.
……think if I bribe the refs, they’ll turn a blind eye to any fisticuffs committed by our team? Cuz that would be awesome.
Hawkeye58: Haha. Depends who the refs are.
Stark1: Heh. Or how much they like money. 😉
Hawkeye58: Yeah. That’ll matter too ha
Stark1: Heh. Well, let’s see what we’re up against. Might be good to stack the odds in our favor.
Hawkeye58: I would not be against that…..Steve might.
Stark1: HA! Hey. What Steve doesn’t know won’t hurt him.
Hawkeye58: Haha good point.
Hawkeye58: So. You guys can make it, then?
Stark1: Idiot. TOLD you we were coming.
Hawkeye58: Yeah. I know. Heh. Can’t wait to see you.
Stark1: Ha. Oh yea?
Hawkeye58: Yeah. Miss you.
Stark1: Heh. You’ve only been gone a day.
Hawkeye58: I know. And it was a long day and had this guy around.
Stark1: Ohhhh…..so if this guy weren’t there, you wouldn’t miss me?
Hawkeye58: Nah. I’d still miss you.
Stark1: Ha. Good to know.
Hawkeye58: Yeah. Hey. I told you that before.
Hawkeye58: That I miss you as soon as I leave.
Stark1: You did not! When did you say that?
Hawkeye58: I swear I’ve told you that…..did I not tell you that?
Stark1: I’ve told YOU that. Your response was to joke about how you thought I would enjoy some silence.
Hawkeye58: And then you asked if I didn’t miss you and I thought I told you I did.
Stark1: Yea……you didn’t say as soon as you left. Figured you just meant at that point. Like, a day later or whenever it was.
Hawkeye58: Oh…..no. Miss you right away.
Stark1: Heh. Glad to hear it.
Hawkeye58: Yeah…..but only you get to know that.
Stark1: Ha. Stingy bastard.
Hawkeye58: Hahaha yup.
Stark1: You EVER going to admit you love me?
Hawkeye58: I tell you I love you all the time.
Stark1: ….didn’t mean……nevermind.
Hawkeye58: What…what do you mean?
Stark1: To other people. I mean, I know you don’t want the general public to know, but you’re always saying “tell anyone and I deny it” whenever you do or say something sappy or lovey-dovey. It’s like you want to keep up some sort of façade that we’re….well…..not a real couple.
Hawkeye58: What? No. I mean. Shit. I didn’t mean it like that. I just. I mean, I wouldn’t deny we’re a couple I just. I’m not good with this.
Stark1: Okay. Sorry.
Hawkeye58: No. No, don’t be. It’s not you.
Stark1: Well I’d hope not.
Hawkeye58: It’s not. Shit. I’m sorry. Fuck. I’ll do better. Promise.
Stark1: It’s okay. I mean. Yea. I’d like that. Love it. But I feel like I’m constantly pushing you out of your comfort zone.
Hawkeye58: Well. Just. I don’t want you to feel the way I’m making you feel.
Stark1: Hey. I know you love me. Just.
It’s okay. Don’t wanna push you.
Hawkeye58: I’m sorry. I’m trying. I really am.
Stark1: I know you are. Fuck. I shouldn’t have said anything. I’m sorry.
Hawkeye58: No. No, I’m glad you did. I hate being this oblivious.
Stark1: Shut up. It’s fine. Really. Forget I said it. I didn’t say it. Never happened.
Hawkeye58: No. You shut up. I love you and I need to learn to stop being so paranoid.
Stark1: …..it’s paranoia, then? Letting SHIELD know, and the others, like Steve? That still worries you?
Hawkeye58: Well. I mean. Fury’s already tried to sort of separate us. And. I don’t know. I know it’s dumb.
Stark1: ……but….you’ll kiss me in front of them. I mean, you’ve kissed me on the helicarrier, and on different SHIELD bases…..
Nevermind. Just. Forget I brought it up. It’s stupid.
Hawkeye58: No. Tony…..I’m sorry. Hey. Please. I don’t want to forget.
…..We’ll talk about it. In person, okay? Shit. I just. I’m not used to this.
Stark1: No. Really. I didn’t want to upset you. I didn’t think before I spoke. As usual.
Hawkeye58: Yeah. But. That’s not something you should have to think about. It’s not something a normal person would have to be told to realize. I’m not being fair.
Stark1: …..I don’t want you to be upset. Please don’t be upset. I love you.
Hawkeye58: I know. I know you do. Just. How do I make it better. Because I love you too. So damn much. So much. And you know. I won’t deny that.
I don’t know. I don’t wanna push. I’m not going to. I push you too much already.
Hawkeye58: Shut up. You push cuz I’m stubborn and kinda stupid when it comes to this stuff. I need it sometimes.
Stark1: I push you all the time! You said once that you don’t know if you’ll ever be as open as I’d like. I don’t ever want to push you to that point. To where it gets to be too much.
Hawkeye58: …..I know. Shit. I just……I hate disappointing you.
Stark1: Shut up.
Hawkeye58: Don’t wanna.
Hawkeye58: I love you.
Can’t wait to see you.
Hawkeye58: Yeah. Hey…..sorry. Really. I’m fine. It’s okay. I just. I wanna see you. And play this game. And then we can get a room or something. It’ll be good.
Stark1: I just wish I’d never said anything. Everything feels all weird now.
Hawkeye58: No. Hey. No. Don’t think like that. Look, I just. I need to learn how to stop freaking out or whatever you would call this every time I do something emotionally stupid. Really. Fuck. It’s fine. We’ll be fine.
Stark1: …….why wouldn’t we be fine? Fuck. What……why wouldn’t we be fine?
Hawkeye58: I don’t know. We are. Shit. That’s not what I meant. I just meant I don’t want you thinking it’s weird. It’s not weird.
Stark1: …….I’m just going to shut up. Cuz everything I say is making things worse.
Hawkeye58: No. What? No. That’ll be worse. You never shut up. That’s not like you.
Stark1: Yea well if everything I say is messed up then it’s better to just keep my mouth closed.
Hawkeye58: It’s not messed up. I told you that.
Stark1: Is too. I should never have brought this up. All I did was make you feel guilty.
Hawkeye58: Hey. No. Not…..not guilty. Just. I don’t know. Look. I really am just being selfish. I don’t like getting close to people, or even hinting that I’m close to people, because I don’t want to get hurt. And it’s a habit I can’t seem to get around, even though I KNOW you won’t do that.
Stark1: …….yea. Fuck. That one you need to get over. If that’s the reason, then yea. Because I won’t. I am never, ever going to leave you, and I am trying my hardest not to hurt you. I love you so fucking much. More than anything.
Hawkeye58: I know. I KNOW. That’s why I’m so damn frustrated with myself. Because I don’t pay attention and I do things. And I am getting better. I know I am.
Stark1: You are. You really are. Which is why I feel terrible that I upset you. I don’t wanna push too hard, cuz you really have been doing well. But really…..please…..that one you need to get over. I don’t want you thinking or worrying, even if it’s subconsciously, that I’d ever do anything to hurt you. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I mean that.
Hawkeye58: I feel the same way about you. Heh. You’re amazing. And surprisingly patient. It’s great. And I mean…….I really want you to go over those papers with me.
Stark1: HA! Patient? Not a word many people use to describe me. But with you, I try to be. And as to the papers, I’m not sure you’ll still feel that way once we’re actually going over them. I’m guessing you’ll be pretty bored.
Hawkeye58: Hahaha. Probably. But I’ll try to focus……was never good with paperwork.
Stark1: It’s okay. We. We’ll work it out.
Hawkeye58: Of course we will.
Stark1: ….I know you don’t want to hear it, but…..sorry.
Hawkeye58: I’m accepting your apology just so you stop giving it.
Stark1: ……okay, well, that means you don’t really accept it for what it is.
Hawkeye58: No, it just means I still don’t get why you’re apologizing.
Stark1: Because I upset you!
Hawkeye58: Oh. Well, thanks. But you still didn’t need to. Heh. I don’t stay upset that long.
Stark1: Yea. Well, it’s important to me.
Hawkeye58: I know. Sorry. I mean. Thanks. For apologizing.
Stark1: Shut up. Not supposed to thank me for that. God. You are SUCH a dork.
Hawkeye58: Well, I don’t know! Haha leave me alone. I’m tryin here.
Stark1: I know. I’m sorry. I appreciate it. We…..we’ll talk about it later, yea? Polo first, than victory/comfort sex, then all the discussions?
Hawkeye58: Yeah. Yeah. Papers. And things.
Stark1: Yea. Things.
And you’re not upset?
Hawkeye58: No, you ass. I’m fine.
Stark1: Okay. Sorry. Heh. Don’t mean to be paranoid.
Hawkeye58: Hey. I can’t comment on paranoia.
Stark1: HA! Too true.
Hawkeye58: Yup. So when’re you guys getting here?
Stark1: Don’t know. Left a while ago. Not sure exactly how long it’ll take Thor and Steve.
Oh man. Wait’ll you see the getup Steve’s in.
Hawkeye58: …..well, now I’m excited. Is it hilarious? Tell me it’s hilarious.
Stark1: Oh, it’s fucking GREAT. He’s in like, a giant version of one of those baby slings. You know, the thing hangs on your shoulders, cradles the kid against your chest?
Hawkeye58: HAHAHA! OH MAN. I am so excited.
Stark1: Haha yea, it’s pretty fucking epic. Get your phone ready to take pictures.
Hawkeye58: Oh, I am.
……..be ready for some supreme sexiness, too.
Hawkeye58: Then I can’t wait for that, either.
Stark1: Heh. Good. Went to a little extra effort, just for you.
Hawkeye58: Yeah? Heh. Should I be even more excited?
Stark1: Oh…..I would think so. I mean…..you find my geekyness sexy, so I would think yes, you’ll like it. Otherwise you’d probably just think I was an ass.
Hawkeye58: Well, I think that, too. 😛
Stark1: Ha! Well, okay. Let me rephrase. Otherwise you would ONLY think I was an ass.
Hawkeye58: Hahaha oh. Okay. Heh. So excited.
Stark1: Haha yea?
Hawkeye58: Yeah. I get to see you. And play a weird game.
Stark1: Yea. Play a weird game with the Wicket Snatcher.
Hawkeye58: HAHAHAHA. Oh my God.
Stark1: Hahaha what. That’s a huge honor, you know.
Hawkeye58: I’m sure it would be if this were croquet.
Stark1: Haha hey! It’s an honor to do ANYTHING with the Wicket Snatcher.
Hawkeye58: Oh. Well. In that case, I am honored.
Stark1: You should be. You get to do…..well……damn near everything with me.
Hawkeye58: Yeah I do. It’s great.
Stark1: Oh? Glad you think so.
Hawkeye58: I do. Course, you’re just as lucky, you know.
Stark1: Mmm, I don’t know. You’re kind of a pain in the ass.
Hawkeye58: You love me.
…….God. What’s wrong with me?
Hawkeye58: Hahaha I have no idea, but I’m glad for it.
Stark1: Seriously. Something is very very wrong with me.
Hawkeye58: Well, I’m not calling a doctor, cuz I don’t want them to fix you.
Stark1: Ha! Nice.
Hawkeye58: Is it? Might be selfish but I don’t care.
Stark1: Haha. Good. Good to know you’ll keep me.
Hawkeye58: Of course I will.
Stark1: Even though I’m clearly broken in multiple ways? 😛
Hawkeye58: Nope. You’re perfect.
Stark1: …….wow. Holy…….wow. You…..fuck.
Hawkeye58: …..I mean. I think so.
……is that. Yeah….
Stark1: No. No that…..that. That’s the most amazing thing you could say to me…….I mean, other than saying you love me.
I can’t believe you said that.
Hawkeye58: Yeah well…….that’s how I feel.
Stark1: That…….Clint. That means so fucking much.
Hawkeye58: Yeah? I didn’t…..I mean. It’s been how I’ve felt. I just. Woulda told you sooner.
Stark1: Heh. No you wouldn’t. And with good reason. I’m a conceited prick.
Hawkeye58: Haha. You definitely can be.
Stark1: Ha! Think that’s being generous.
…….you too, you know.
Hawkeye58: What? I’m conceited? Ha. So I’m told.
Stark1: No, you idiot. I mean, yea. You are. But that’s not what I meant. I meant you’re perfect. I don’t care if you can forget to call and let me know you’re okay or if you still have problems with showing affection in front of others. Those are just….I don’t know. Glitches? Something. But they don’t take away from how utterly perfect you are to me.
Hawkeye58: ……can you be here now because I honestly don’t know what to say to that and I just wanna kiss you or something.
Stark1: Haha I feel completely the same. My interest in polo has dwindled. Very much in the background now. Kisses and cuddles first.
Hawkeye58: Yup. Can wait a little bit.
Stark1: Heh yea? Really?
Hawkeye58: Yeah. Jerk can wait a couple minutes.
Stark1: Ha! God I love you.
Um….forewarning. I’m not in very snuggle-ready clothes. But it’ll still totally work.
Hawkeye58: What? You mean your suit?
Stark1: Heh. No.
Hawkeye58: Well then it’s fine. Granted, I wouldn’t care if it were your suit, either.
Stark1: HA! You’d cuddle me in my suit?
Hawkeye58: Yup. It’d be fucking ridiculous. But I’d do it if the situation called for it.
…….not sure what situation would call for it, though.
Stark1: Haha now I want to create a situation just to make it happen. Oh man.
Hawkeye58: Haha you would.
Stark1: Totally would.
Hawkeye58: Heh. Well. Have at it, then.
Stark1: Oh? I have your permission, Agent Barton, sir?
Hawkeye58: Hahaha you suck. Told you. That sounds so weird coming from you. 😛
Stark1: HAHA oh, now it’s just from me? Thought you didn’t like it at all. But I guess I should feel special.
Hawkeye58: Well. I mean, I don’t. But it’s even weirder coming from you. Practically unnatural.
Stark1: HAHAHAHA oh man. Unnatural?
Hawkeye58: Yeah. I don’t know. It’s weird.
Stark1: Ha. Well. It’s unnatural when YOU do it, but I love it. Sexy as fuck.
Hawkeye58: Haha I guess.
Stark1: Ha. No “guess”. It’s definitely sexy.
Hawkeye58: Heh, you know……I think so, too. Who knew, right.
Stark1: ………..yea? Really?
Hawkeye58: Yeah. I mean. It’s weird, right? My issue with authority figures is pretty well known. Didn’t think that would be a fetish I would ever even consider. The first time I did it I thought it was really just because holy shit, your reaction. The second time I realized yes, this was still all kinds of hot.
Stark1: Heh. That. Is awesome. Fuck. Now next time it happens……freaking hell.
Hawkeye58: Heh. Yeah, well. Feel free to go all out. You’re sexy as fuck and you know I have no qualms telling authority off if I really don’t wanna do something.
Stark1: ……fuck. You’re killing me.
Hawkeye58: Sorry. Just throwing it out there.
Stark1: Haha. Ass. And you expect me to concentrate on polo?
Hawkeye58: Hahaha hey! Come on. We have to score at least once.
Stark1: Haha then stop being sexy and distracting me!
Hawkeye58: I’ll try but I don’t know if I can stop the sexiness.
Stark1: Ha! Smug bastard. Well, turn it down a notch. Use the regular amp. Doesn’t need to go up to 11.
Hawkeye58: Tch. Fine. Toning it down. 😛
Stark1: Hahaha. Good.
…….you like ‘Spinal Tap’, right?
Hawkeye58: Uh. Which one was that?
Stark1: …… the “documentary” about the band Spinal Tap?
Hawkeye58: Oh, right! Ha. Yeah. That was great.
Stark1: Hahaha how can you forget that movie? Dork. Made of epic win.
Hawkeye58: Hey. All the titles start to blur together.
Stark1: …….THE BAND AND THE MOVIE ARE BOTH CALLED ‘SPINAL TAP’. How do you forget that?
Hawkeye58: Hahaha I don’t know! Just happens.
Stark1: Heh. Ass.
Hawkeye58: Hey. Not my fault.
Stark1: Bet if it was an action movie you’d remember the name. 😛
Hawkeye58: Hahaha shut the hell up.
Stark1: HA! God I love you.
Hawkeye58: Yeah? Even though I forget obvious movie titles?
Stark1: Ha. Yea. Still love you tons.
Hawkeye58: Good. Don’t know what I’d do otherwise.
Stark1: Heh. Find another rich guy to buy you food? 😉
Hawkeye58: Would totally not be the same.
Stark1: Oh? The food wouldn’t be as good if someone else bought it?
Hawkeye58: Nope. It would suck.
Stark1: Heh. I love you.
You’re very affectionate today.
Hawkeye58: Am I?
Stark1: Yea. Maybe. I don’t know? Seems like it.
Hawkeye58: Heh. Probably because I got all up in arms earlier. Stayed emotional.
Stark1: Ha. Well, whatever the reason, I like it.
Hawkeye58: Yeah? Good.
Stark1: Heh. Yea.
Hawkeye58: Mnn. So. You almost here?
Stark1: Yup. Well, think so. I’m tracking you to find the house heh. So if you stay put, then yea.
Hawkeye58: Well, I’m walking around. Should I stop? That doesn’t mess it up too much, does it?
Stark1: Haha as long as you stay in the general area.
Hawkeye58: Oh yeah. Not going too far.
Stark1: Good. I’ll see you in a few minutes, then.
Hawkeye58: Can’t wait.